Homesick
by UbermenschBodhisattva

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

>Thing in the sky: Fall

The colossal thing that John and Vriska are looking at does not fall. Instead, it hangs in the sky much in the same way that bricks don't. Shrouded in clouds, and far off toward the horizon, yet of such proportion as to be visible even from a great distance. It is like a devilfish in shape - one of the cephalopods that rarely swim out of the deep on Eszett, or beach themselves in death like alien things from another reality.

From this great distance, the two can only make out its faint outline - in spite of its huge proportions, it might be described as slender and graceful, having a long, dartlike body, from the base of which long, serpentlike tendrils extend, coiling slowly with the glacial majesty intrinsic to particularly large things, such that they appear to be moving slowly relative to their own great size even when their absolute speed is quite great. A billowing dark cloud spreads from it in all directions, the edge approaching them and the ocean at an alarming rate.

Vriska: That is some seriously 8ad juju. It gives me the hee8ie-jee8ies just looking at it.

John: yeah. that's what i was hoping i could get a better look at since i think i'm starting to understand how this dream stuff works after screwing around with you for a little while.

John: when i first started this dream, it was because i went under after taking some drugs that my uh

John: clown master gave me so that i could start practicing dream walking

Vriska: Taking drugs from a clown. Fantastic discretion. How can such a 8onehead have such an apparent talent for the mystic arts, anyway?

John: quiet you!

John: anyway, this is one of the last really important things that i can think of that happened... pretty much right before we got kidnapped by pirates i think.

John: i'm not really too sure what it means, but it seems like it's probably important because it's weird!

John: it's going to get real misty in a second when that cloud gets here.

John: what do you think it is? you're like a universe travelling adventurer from the sound of things, so i thought you might know what to make of it.

Vriska: *Vriska is visi8ly interested, 8ut also disquieted.* Nuh uh. I mean... it's not like any dragon I've ever heard of, which is the only thing I can think of that might 8e 8ig enough.

John: dragons are real!? and that 8ig?!

Vriska: You really are in the dark a8out a lot, aren't you?

John: yes! aargh! until basically two weeks ago i didn't even know gods were a real thing.

John: let alone dragons and elves!

John: but that thing isn't one, i guess? not a dragon or a god. probably not an elf.

Vriska: Don't think so. But it gives me a 8ad 8ad vi8e.

Vriska: I do not feel good a8out staying here to watch what happens when that cloud gets here in a minute, even knowing this is a dream.

John: alright. i guess i will come back another time when i'm alone.

John: *he takes her hand, and the dream dissipates back to the grey nothing of dreamless sleep.*

John: you seem like you have rotten enough dreams without me making you relive some of my weird memories. i think i should probably see if i can't wake myself up soon anyway, and try to get back to important real life business, instead of fooling around in dreams, anyway.

Vriska: *Vriska has relaxed a lot.* Yeah same, pro8a8ly. This ship 8n't going to run itself, 8eing a Captain is delicate work, and I usually keep it to short power naps.

John: anyway, thanks for your help. i think i did learn one thing from this dream which is that something extra weird is going on here. if my hunch is right, and that flying thing has something to do with all of the shenanigans going on,

John: and that flying thing gives even a seasoned universe adventurer like you the willies

John: then this seems like more than just a cut and dry curse - there's some kind of weird explanation for why this curse happened to me and my kin... and my world, i guess!

Vriska: *She smirks excitedly, sensing a plot unfolding.* Sounds to me like you have a real mystery to solve.

Vriska: Who knows? It's seeming kind of interesting, so may8e if we somehow run into each other again here in the Dreaming, you can keep me filled in. May8e someone with my autonomy and resources could 8e useful in helping you solve it? Seems like the sort of quest that is going to involve some kind of serious magic, and you know what they say a8out ru88ing up against power.

John: maybe i will.

John: so.

John: *he smiles at her.

John: guess i better wake up now.

Vriska: *She gives him a flirtatious smile back.*

Vriska: Guess you 8etter.

Vriska: Do you know how?

John: i guess i don't! *he looks around.*

John: maybe you could help me with your universe-trotting expertise?

Vriska: *She gives him a cheeky smile.* As a matter of fact, I happen to know a universal remedy for waking yourself up from a dream if you're lucid.

Vriska: *In a flash, she dreams up a sword and runs him through.*

>John: Wake

John wakes with a start from his dream, yelping. He touches his chest where Vriska dream-skewered him to find himself in one piece, and then chuckles.

John: whew. just a dream.

John: hehe. guess she got me back pretty good for beating her earlier in the dream.

John: *he looks around the room.*

He is sitting in Gamzee's trailer once again lying in a floor poof. It is still bright outside, suggesting it's probably only the early afternoon now that he's awake. Lucky, he supposes. He still has a lot to do today. And in general apparently. He supposes he has one more thing to add to his list of quests now - check back in with Rose and find out just what the heck is going on, because she sure does seem to know. Still, he'd better be careful and spread out his visits. He has Devas to worry about.

His face feels sticky.

John: *he gets up and looks for a mirror. he's got a bad feeling about this.

John: oh god damnit.

John: *his face is all made up in the white greasepaint used by the clowns, giving his face a grim and threatening aspect.*

John: i'd better go talk to the ringmaster.

John: *john heads outside, not bothering to deal with the makeup right now.*

Gamzee: *soon, he runs into gamzee, who is all up and practicing his juggling in the courtyard.*

Gamzee: Oh Yo! HeY tHeRe NeW fRiEnD :o)

Gamzee: GlAd To SeE yOu FiNiShEd Up GeTtInG yOuR bEaUtY rEsT oN. yOu HaVe A gOoD dReAm, MoThErFuCkEr?

John: sort of! i actually had a pretty bad trip at first, but then i figured out that i was dreaming! and i could control the dream! and i think i saw some important visions? it was cool if kind of disturbing! i think i met a space travelling elf who was also dreaming, and she might have been a crafty pirate who has something to do with all this!

Gamzee: WoAh, ReAl ShIt? SoUnDs LiKe YoU aLrEaDy GeTtInG rIgHt ThE fUcK uP iN tHiS mYsTeRy QuEsT's GrIlL tHeN. mY bIg BrO iS gOnNa Be HeLlS oF pLeAsEd To HeAr ThAt RiGhTeOuS nOiSe.

John: right. i need to talk to him. wait. kurloz - the ringmaster - he's your brother?

John: not just like, your monk brother or something?

John: i assume you clowns are actually like some kind of monk, right? like the kind that goes off into the wilderness to become a hermit and think about god and stuff.

Gamzee: HeHeHe, YeAh ThAt SoUnDs AbOuT rIgHt To Be ThE sOrT oF tHiNg WhAt To SaY aBoUt ThE pLaCe OuR hEaRt'S uP iN. aNd YoU tOo NoW tHaT yOu A hOnOrArY oNe Of Us :o)

Gamzee: BuT yOu CaN't TaLk To HiM rIgHt NoW. hE's BuSy. LiKeS tO gO iNtO hIs TeNt SoMeTiMeS aLoNe WiTh MeUlIn To KnOcK oN tHe SkY aNd LiStEn To ThE sOuNd It MaKeS, oR sOmE pIoUs ShIt LiKe ThAt. )o:

John: dang. well tell him that this whole experience was kind of unsettling, but that i'll definitely be back for more lessons in the future.

John: starting with finding out what he meant with all those riddles he's all up in talking to me.

John: bluh. i mean all these riddles he's talking in.

Gamzee: *He GiVeS aN eXtReMe SlOpPy SaLuTe InTo A tHuMbS uP, sMiLiNg PlAcIdLy.*

Gamzee: YoU cAn CoUnT oN mE tO dElIvEr YoUr MeSsAgE bRoThEr. MaYbE i'Ll Go On A dReAm QuEsT wItH yOu SoMeTiMe MySeLf.

Gamzee: Aw MaN, i'M sO pUmPeD aBoUt ThAt... I mIgHt HaVe To GeT mY hUg On WiTh YoU, bRo.

John: *john recoils slightly in horror, gritting his teeth as gamzee goes in for a hug, half-heartedly patting him on the back as the smelly giant of a clown embraces him. friends are friends, but this is still a little too close for comfort.*

John: heh. thanks gamzee.

John: i better go now. i have places i have to go, and people i have to see.

John: *once gamzee breaks the hug, john crouches down, and then jumps into the sky again, hurtling up into the air, until with a bang, he disappears through the abyssal stairs.*

>Nepeta: Collect the infinity gems!

Nepeta cannot collect the Infinity Gems. Sadly, Nepeta exists in a context in which she and the Infinity Gems are mutually fictional from each other's frame of reference. However, right now she is having the time of her life, as she hurtles through blinding nothing with a new friend. Roxy lands the two of them at Nepeta's house.

Roxy: *roxy sets em both down a short way from the shanty*

Nepeta: :3 < *nepeta sets down on all fours, before standing upright again.*
Roxy: ta daaaa!

Roxy: i assume this must be the house you were talkin bout earlier, rite? dis ur place?

Nepeta: :3 < yes! wow33! that was some magic trick! *she claps her hands excitedly.*

Nepeta: :3 < you are not only a thief! youre some kind of wizard thief, like some kind of arcane trickster!

Roxy: yissssss :D

Roxy: i am def some kind of radical dream wizard who destiny dumped into your lap to be the greatest stealsis in history :3

Nepeta: :3 < you mean stealbro :?

Roxy: i got so totally carried away with how awesome this is, i completely forgot!

Roxy: i don't normally look like this, im under a curse from an asura

Roxy: it changes my gender every day. its kind of confusing and it can get real easy to forget what pronouns i'm going by on a given day but im tryna keep it consistent. it's exhaustin!

Nepeta: :3 < wow! what a petty curse to put on a person! thats such a silly thing to do to someone.

Nepeta: :3 < *nepeta blushes brightly thinking about the implications.*

Roxy: ikr! me n my sis, who is even more wizardly than me because shes taking lessons from a creepy uncle, think she might have put it on me bc she wants 2 jump my bones or somn

Roxy: it's kind of a distraction from the main quest bc we're like tryna find a way to fix our ghostiness.

Nepeta: :3 < oh my goodness!

Nepeta: :3 < *nepeta holds still and sits listening, purring, and smiling placidly while roxy paces around and around, explaining.*

Roxy: i know, rite?!

Roxy: neway, i thought... maaaaaaybe if we're gon 2 be steal siblings... u'd like to help me on this quest? ;3

Roxy: idk why i trust u so much right out of the gate, but ur just clearly such a good person its like dis overwhelmingly chill vibe i get about you.

Nepeta: :3 < h33h33h33! what a sw33t thing to say :3c

Nepeta: :3 < what a sweet thing to say! youre like the nicest person ever, i cant wait to introduce you to equius :3c

Roxy: wait is dat a trick of the light or r u some kind of kitty girl? :O

Nepeta: :3 < *now in the better light of the outside, especially with the rain having cleared up, roxy can tell that nepeta is not at all a normal purrson, but indeed some kind of kitty purrson! with whiskers, paws, and a pair of tall pointy ears that make tents in her oversized hood.* i guess i am kind of like a kitty! im a du though!

Roxy: ????

Nepeta: :3 < huh?

Nepeta: :3 < have you never heard of a du before?!

Roxy: nuh uh. tell me of ur ways!

Nepeta: :3 < oh! well... hm. i dont know where to start!

Nepeta: :3 < i guess... were these... people who have a lot in common with animals both in how we look and how we act! rrgh. i would just tell you to ask equius when we go visit him but hes kind of a stuffy guy and a little bit of a racist! he doesnt mean it badly but he just has kind of outdated ideas about the way things work.

Roxy: hmmm. whys this guy your best friend again?

Nepeta: :3 < shut up :3

Nepeta: :3 < shut up is why.

Roxy: so were gonna go see him?

Nepeta: :3 < mhm! we should. oh boy, im so excited :3c - hes going to be sooooo mad when he finds out i have a new stealing buddy h33h33

Roxy: u seem like u just like gettin a rise out of this guy!

Nepeta: :3 < maybe i do! maybe he n33ds somebody to remind him what life is like out in the str33ts.

Nepeta: :3 < first though, im going to eat some snacks from my stash. you want some?

Roxy: no way, i just ate a burger n im rly regretting eatin that much. our ghostly metabolisms don't need much.

Nepeta: :3 < *nepeta helps herself to some tough looking meat strips from her stash that are probably jerky, and sits across from roxy, who has made himself comfy on a box in nepeta's little dwelling, and observes him.*

Nepeta: :3 < *it occurs to roxy that for all of this young lady's boundless energy, nepeta is observing him with a fairly critical eye.*

Nepeta: :3 < so youre some kind of ghosty person?

Nepeta: :3 < you don't seem like any ghost ive ever heard of.

Nepeta: :3 < i guess you seem like a friendly ghost if you are one.

Roxy: eeeh, im not a dead person or nething its kind of confusing to explain.

Roxy: and probably relies on a working knowledge of metaphysics

Nepeta: :3 < im smart! try me :3

Roxy: i already explained it once today so lemme give u the short version.

Roxy: me n my peeps got scooped up to here by sum pirates

Roxy: and were under a curse that makes us less real than usual so we have ghosty powers and probably some negatives that i don't know about yet.

Roxy: but the point is were tryin to become real again.

Nepeta: i s33! you seem real enuff to me.

Roxy: thx! i feel real enough.

Nepeta: *nepeta finishes her snack, and gets up, stretching.*

Nepeta: :3 < alright, well we'll see what equius thinks of you.

Nepeta: :3 < he might be kind of a stupid jerk sometimes but i think youll find he has a really good sense for when someone's a good person.

Nepeta: :3 < i wanna see if my space glove can do the same magic you just did to take us to his house! hold onto my hand?

Roxy: ooh, great idea :)

Roxy: *roxy takes nep's ungloved hand, offered to her.* take us there :3

>Nepeta: Snap and see what happens

Nepeta raises her gloved hand, and snaps her armored fingers. She and Roxy vanish with a bang.